caedesdeo: (Default)
Yeah, more ramblings.

1. No, of course the cash only rule of the cash only till doesn't apply to you, you're special.

2. Yes, it does bloody tell you that this till is cash only. In at least four highly visible places.

3. I started scanning your sodding shopping onto the person ahead of you's sodding shopping because you put it on the conveyor half a sodding inch apart and didn't use a sodding divider. I can't tell your sodding shopping and their sodding shopping apart without them, that's the whole sodding point of having them.

4. Yes, yes I did just have the utter bloody temerity to say hello to you, there's no need to look at me like I've proposed some form of illicit sex game in the bread aisle.

5. How the bloody hell do you get all the way around the store, starting twenty minutes before we finish and stopping ten minutes after, to the checkout, through the checkout, and to the point where all you shopping is bagged, before realising you've forgotten your wallet?
caedesdeo: (Default)
1. Your small child is disgusting, and covered in it's own facial fluids. Stop looking at it as if it has won the Nobel Prize.

2. You look like you're about 13, small boy. Why did you just buy a pregnancy test?!

3. Tannoy: please take your stupid REM song out of my head.

4. Customer: stop singing along. You are not helping.

5. Old gentleman: you were pleasant, and funny, and trying to be charming. I like you, you reminded me of my grandad.

6. Lady, your daughter is wearing make-up. a) she looks about 9. b) she looks like a hooker. This is not a good combination. No, really.

7. No, I cannot give you your change differently. It is all in small coins because that is all that is in my change drawer. Stop whining.

8. Weightwatchers wine. Weightwatchers wine. Weightwatchers wine. The Hell?!
caedesdeo: (Default)
1. Note to self: stop staring down the customer's top. She may have lovely breasts and she may be about to fall out if she leans any further over, but stop it. Her boyfriend almost noticed.

2. How the hell did you fit all of that in a basket?!

3. Read the goddamned instructions on the goddamned card reader screen. Do not put your PIN in when it's still deciding if it's a card or a piece of toast you have stuck in it, and do not then pull your card out when it beeps at you. Whole damn process must now be restarted.

4. This is morrisons. Why the hell would we sell spectacles?!

5. You just bought bettabuy everything. Why are you speaking like the queen?

6. This is an express till. Express Why did you come to it, wait until everything was scanned then pay then squint at your receipt then start putting your shopping away in your wheelybag so slowly your milk curdled? There are people behind you!

7. You bought a packet of teabags. One packet. Why did that need a trolley?!

8. Our carriers are not that weak. You do not need to double-bag a single bottle of pop. Especially when you have bought six freaking bottles!

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caedesdeo

June 2011

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